Author: imsorry17
I wasn’t always someone who preferred being alone, but I’ve always been pretty quiet. My social anxiety started because of my parents and trauma when I was around 5. Anyways don’t wanna trauma dump
Sometimes it makes me feel like an alien. For example, I was playing a video game today and someone on the enemy game mentioned a somewhat niche game that I reallyyyy like and we typed in chat for a bit. Then after the game they added me and it lowkey mad me feel guilty. Why? Because I didn’t wanna accept it. I knew they’d probably wanna talk on the mic and I’m too shy for that. So I didn’t accept either of their friend requests. They probably ended up thinking I’m rude or weird or both.
Idk, I just wish that I wasn’t THIS socially awkward and anxious. But at the same time, I do enjoy being alone. I just worry that someday I’ll go insane from being so isolated everyday for years
The problem is I want someone almost exactly like me…
I’m like this and you’re lucky someone sends friend request because nobody does to me and the times I sent to see what it goes, they rejected me. I am always a rejected.
it’s ok to feel like this, I can understand the social anxiety. it’s probably better than trying to cope, I tried getting on medication to curb my social anxiety and it turned me into a benzo addict instead. I’m in recovery now, going to rehab in 2 weeks but I feel like I have chemically traumatized my brain from being on klonopin every day for 2 years.
I cummed to this ahhhh I’m cumming uuuuughhh! I’m cumming!
Remember that really chatty, sociable people meet tons of different people constantly, including people like you. Hence the whole “extrovert adopting introvert friend” thing. They’re used to people who don’t like to hang or talk much, even if they’re friends, and instead of getting butt hurt, they talk to someone else. If you do ever want to add them, transparency is the best you can do. Just say you don’t like voice chat.
You don’t have a single responsibility in life. There aren’t anything you should be doing or not be doing. As long as your choices don’t affect anyone, everything comes down to your comfort. Who cares if they ended up thinking you’re weird? You probably won’t even see them once. I understand how you feel about wanting to be more like an average person during social interactions but if there are things you don’t feel comfortable with then that’s totally fine. It doesn’t mean you’re weird. It just proves how everyone is different, that’s all there is to it. You don’t have to feel comfortable with using your mic especially with people you only know through the internet. It’s okay. Just tell them beforehand that you wouldn’t want to be a part of it if they’re going to use their mics but you’d still like to be their friends. That’s more normal than anything. If they find it off putting then that’s their problem. As I said, you don’t have to be anything, just existing by itself is hard to stand. Your personal differences don’t make you awkward.