How I Tried Being Gay

Author: chad thundercock

A storytime of how I tried out being gay a few times

It may come as a shock to some, but in real life I sort of exude a gay vibe…
basically I attract a lot of gay people in my life and thus I also have had a lot of opportunities for being gay.

For 18 years I didnt have a crush, yet all my friends had dated someone or even had boyfriends. During that time period I had been asked out several times by guys and girls. I assumed since I had been on several dates and had friendships with many guys, yet never had a crush on any of them I must be missing something.

I didnt choose the gay life, it chose me.

So I decided to turn my opportunities into possible blessings.
For some reason, Ive had a lot of girls end up having crushes on me (not tooting my own horn just the truth). Even homophobic ones, so I assumed I must be suppressing some sort of homosexual tendencies that others could feel.

My first experience was with my ex best friend, she had already confessed her feelings to me 6 years and then later on 4 years prior. As if the universe knew I was trying to test the waters of my gayness, we got into a sort of gay situation.

Pretty much, it was raining and all of our other friends ran off to the closest building with a roof, I wasnt in a rush because I was pulling out my umbrella since it was just dribbling rain drops. When I looked down to grab my umbrella from my purse and took it up, I looked up and already saw an umbrella pulled up because she was holding it out for me. It was REALLY GAY because i looked up and for some reason felt my face burn up (just typing this out is making me remember the whole gay vibe). ANyways, she just laughed and i felt mega gay but also weird. We ended up having a sleepover, and we had a bit too much too drink. All I remember is we practiced kissing, i was not into it though, I ended up going into her bathroom and climbing out of her window to escape this super gay situation. Also I should mention she was homophobic when I first met her and I was her first crush (apparently thats what she told me)

Second time, it was this British girl, everyone should know where this went wrong. She was fun and chill to talk to but she started flirting with me, thought it was just friendly till a mutual friend of ours told her feelings out to me… felt bad so i agreed to date her but broke up with her 4 days later after feeling miserable about the fact i was dating someone. Also, she wanted me to call her “baby”, that was egregious.

Third time: girl I met at work asked for my number on a shift, gave it to her assuming since she invited me to a concert that her band was opening for. After the concert, she invited me to hang out with her band, all i remember was how bored I was especially because all of her band mates were these super chuds who’s life ambitions consisted of being music elitists and calling everyone posers. she tried to kiss me but i dodged, it was awkward and i laughed it off. After i left, at 1 am she sent me a nude picture, it didnt really make feel anything besides making me look down my own pants to compare the similarities and differences in anatomy

After a few other gay situations I came to the conclusion I might not be gay. I did end up having my first crush a few months later, on a guy who would do my math homework for me, he wore glasses and had brown eyes but i got stressed out thinking about the potential situation where id have to date him. However, i continued to see him because he would let me drive his car (i have no license because ive never taken any lessons) and my heart would be beating so fast when I drove (ended up realizing this wasnt because i had feelings for him, but because im scared of driving). So turns out I also never had a feeling crush on him, but he was pretty hot so I guess I had a physical crush on him.

THE END…..